Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Virginia Adventures, Part 1

I'm just now starting to recover from my crazy trip to Virginia. The trip up there was quick and easy, but then the REAL adventure began by immediately jumping into the busy, bustling world of a bride-to-be!

The week began with the arrival of family members that I had met long ago in Morris, Oklahoma. Aunt Carol and Uncle Bob came! I love Carol. She and I just hit it off so many years ago when we met, and we still had some strange likeness in our light hearted way of looking at situations. She was a joy to befriend again. The evening was lovely with a cookout and then a movie. It was a lil' awkward because they are all drinkers, and I am not. These are people that I grew up with, and so they knew me under some really strict guidelines that I was under w/ my parents. Now that I am an "adult" - don't tell my father- I think they expected my beliefs to be different now. It's a strange realization when you are faced with the idea that you are not just under your parents' standards, but your own. It was fun.

Throughout the whole trip, I was asked twice how much I had had to drink! I took so much joy in telling the enquiring one that I was just like that Sober! I didn't need alcohol to be crazy.

There were many errands to be run and plans to be made to accommodate the other arriving family members, the already there family members w/out vehicles, and the dog. Oh that dog! Unfortunately, I dislike dogs. The bride owns a Siberian Husky. ugh... that means that dog hair was all over EVERYTHING I owned. I eventually embraced it as much as I could. I mean, someone had to walk the dog and pick up it's poop. Who better to help out in this way than the Maid of Honor? I mean, let's think about this. Your whole family is here, and you are trying to show them your apartment and catch up, when all of the sudden your stupid dog needs to go for a walk!? How about the non-family member do it? It makes perfect sense, really. So Autumn and I became good friends. (said through gritted teeth of course)

enough for now...

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Oh Virginia!

Sometimes I feel like as soon as this new post window comes up, I have to immediately change into spititual mode and talk about some new revelation God has shown me! Well, today is not that day. Today, I'm just going to talk about life!

Tomorrow I leave to go to VA to be the Maid of Honor in my friend's wedding. I have known the bride, Patricia, ever since the 2nd grade. Yeah, we have school in Oklahoma. We were close for awhile when we were young, but then during Middle School the friendship kind of halted. She started getting really clingy and making ultimatums like "You have to pick between Katie or Me!" Naturally, I picked Katie because any real friend wouldn't have made me pick!! These were huge statements in 5th grade!! Then she started to chase me around school, kind of stalking me, which seemed to be the popular thing to do this year in college. That's another story for another blog.
Anyway, life went on, and we were in marching band together. She did the flags and I played the flute. We were still friends. THEN a foreign exchange student came and stayed with my family. He was from Germany, and at that time, one of my older brothers had a terrible reputation around our community. This only needs to be mentioned because the people in charge of Roman's visit decided that he should be put in a better living environment. Guess who he then lived with? Patricia. He lives with Patricia, and ends up sleeping with her. Again, this was in 9th grade i think. That was a pretty awkward conversation to have with her, because of course, we were all "in love" with him. Even through that, God just reminded me of his protection. Honestly, had Roman and I been home alone, I could easily see something like that happening. God protected me, and once Patricia opened that door, our friendship again turned to the colder side. She began partying and drinking and engaging in some activities that I don't have anything to do with. We were still friends, but I only really knew one side of her. She met this guy in H.S. named Mel. Mel was a jerk. It was very clear from the start. I didn't like him, but somehow Patricia couldn't see how much he was verbally abusive to her. When I talked to her about it, she told me that Mel gave her an STD, and she felt like no one would ever want her after that.

what do you say to that?

I told her that wasn't the case, and it's not worth still being with him. She didn't listen. We graduated, and I went off to SC. Patricia and Mel got married and he became physically abusive. Patricia, in all the years that I've known her, has always been a very strong and independent person. She divorced that jackass and moved out. At work, she met a guy named David who actually showed her that he cared for her. This was new. She and David have been together now for a lil' over a year, and are getting married on Friday. I couldn't be happier for her.

Life doesn't turn out the way you think it will, that's guarenteed. I'm just glad I can be a part of her life, and a part of this happy weekend.

P.S.- David is black, and so the wedding is gonna be a lot of fun!! Yes, I mean that in the best way possible!

Monday, July 07, 2008

Because it's not about me

Resolve: To get my focus back where it needs to be. I don't have all the answers, and I won't, but things always look a lot worse when I focus on myself rather than Christ. I'm sorry.

Sunday, July 06, 2008

Plethera of Feelings, from the girl.

Currently: listening to "INDEPENDENT." Yup. It's a rap song that I like.

Awkward Moment of the Night: I was over at my friend's house and I felt something tickling my leg. It was under my jeans, so I assumed it was just the jeans crumpling in a weird angle. I re-adjusted. 2 minutes later, I felt it again. I thought I was going crazy, but then I re-adjusted the issue again. For the third time, I felt the tickling, but this time it was slowly, but definitively crawling up my leg. I didn't know what to do! I decided to grab the material around the tickling. When I did this, I felt something hard underneath. Yes, something was apparently trapped within my grasp. I wanted to scream, but instead I let go of my grip and shook my leg furiously. All of the sudden, at the bottom of my pant let, a beetle like creature came out and flew away. It was like the coolest magic trick in the world! I have NO clue how a beetle somehow got in the position of crawling up my knee, but it was kind of cool when it was making its escape. In a way, I wish someone would have seen it because it really was a glorious moment. Of course, no one saw it. That's not how moments in my life work. I love take pride in seeing and enjoying what no one else sees.

Troubling Moment of the Day: Receiving a message on facebook from a brother who doesn't stay in contact. The message was asking about me and a guy that is in some pictures with me on facebook.After not really being a part of my life, he asks, "Are you and that Stephen* guy hitting it?" My Christian brother asked me if I was "HITTING IT" with this guy!?!? I was apphauled, and it still ticks me off. After I confronted him with the inappropriateness of his comment, he said that he was just being an older brother and looking out for me. Cha. Whatever.

None of them know me at all.


*name has been changed


Unresolved: Family issues. Do you bring them up to search for resolution, or do you just pray for help to get over them? Is it beneficial to let people know how you really feel? Should I tell my dad that I did not like him at all growing up and thought he didn't love me until I was in college? Hmm.. maybe we'll just keep pretending like we've always been a happy family. I'm not given the luxury of not being okay with the way things happened in the past. My brothers really messed up and affected my home life, growing up. And it's like I have no right to not feel okay about it. According to my dad, I just cried about everything and was too sensitive, but he said it was good that I was genuine. I'm genuinely hurt, and I don't know how to deal with it at times. The only way I know how to deal with it is to cry, and clearly, that's not acceptable. I'm trapped in this sensitive emotional blunder in my heart, trying to build a calice so I can talk about it, but not being able to harden my heart. I don't want a hard heart, but I can feel one coming on. Maybe everyone has these unresolved issues, and maybe I'm just saying that to make myself feel better. Anyway, there is no resolution for it right now or else it wouldn't be under the "unresolved" label. duh, Leah.

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Hot Pink Happiness!

This summer, the Lord has allowed me to find a job of doing yard work to help supplement my income of not much. Today, after working at Centre Stage, I went to do the yard work. First of all, I have recently had to pray that God would give me a better attitude about doing the work He has provided. I LOATHE yard work. Yup. It's true, and recently I have been so sick and tired of all the bugs in the soil that I dig up, the bug bites, and even the dreams that I've been having about bugs have made me hate the job even more! BUT God is good in allowing me to really enjoy the work today. *gasp* I know, I know. Part of the enjoyment was finding these old Hot wheel style cars in the soil. Yeah, apparently lil' Cletus was playing outside one day long ago and did not pick up his toys. I found a beautiful Hot Pink Old fashioned car in the dirt and immediately fell in love. That Neon colored piece of glory just made my whole night better! Bright colors and glitter have such a positive effect on me, and I just truly believe that God allowed me to find that car. I asked that God would help me to enjoy the work, and He did!